Trip to Thailand

January 7, 2008

I have just gotten back to Kyzylorda after two weeks in Thailand and I must say that my trip was both good and bad. Good in that the food was great, the people were super friendly, the weather was amazing, and the country is beautiful, and bad in that I was only there for two weeks. It was definitely the perfect plac
I ended up going to Thailand with two other Peace Corps volunteers because I figured that it would be safer and more fun to explore a new country and culture with friends, and I also knew that it would probably make my mom feel better. In retrospect this wasn’t really necessary and in fact if I ever go again I think I will go by myself. While I definitely enjoyed having my friends around, the people of Thailand are so friendly, and there are so many European and Australian tourists around that it is impossible to ever feel lonely there. Furthermore, I found traveling in Thailand as a group to be a bit unwieldy. There is so much to see there, and that you cannot really see the things that you want unless everyone can go off and do their own thing.  
Anyway, we left Almaty on the 22nd, and the first interesting thing about the trip was the plane itself; it was filled with Thai tourists on their way home. The three of us were amazed, being unable to imagine anyone going to Kazakhstan for vacation, especially during the winter. The only conclusion we could make was that perhaps they had come in order to finally see snow. We got to Thailand at around five in the afternoon and immediately began to sweat. Even after taking off our sweaters and jackets on the plane, the temperature difference was something to get used to, though we quickly came to enjoy it. We spent our first night at the lub-d hostel in Bangkok, getting ourselves organized for trips down to the islands, and the next morning we explored the area around the Grand Palace, particularly the Amulet market which not only had some very cool cheap Buddhist trinkets, but some amazing street food.  
In fact, let me take this opportunity to say that everyone should go to Thailand, if for no other reason than the food. After a year and a half of eating meat, potatoes and onions and where fresh fruit is often prohibitably expensive, it was amazing to go to a place where you could buy large hunks of pineapple for a dollar, and eat delicious curries and stir fries with fresh vegetables for not much more. I also imbibed large quantites of Thai iced coffee on my trip; doing my best to make up for a year of dehydrated flakes, and in a moment of weakness even treated myself to Starbucks.
Anyway, in the afternoon of the 23rd we got on a bus and headed down to Koh Samet. We ended up not staying in Koh Samet proper, but rather Rayong, a small town on the mainland nearby. The place we stayed at was called Roots-the Reggae house, for good reason. The owner and operator was this really nice German guy who was probably stoned half the time, and his main help was an equally relaxed American expat/Rastafarian who last lived in the U.S. in 1974. The place was already pretty cheap to start with, and then once we got there he knocked another 20 bucks off the final bill. I think most of the guests were what would be described as “long-term,” and looking at the terms of long-term stay, I could see why they would. Not only were they in a beautiful location, but the food served was good, and as a long term guest you got your seventh day, week, month, year, etc. for free. Even though we slept in Rayong we spent most of the 24th, 25th, and 26th on Koh Samet, which was easily reachable by ferry. It turned out that we made the right choice by not staying on Koh Samet because it was a good bit more expensive and packed with tourists, and it was nice to be able to escape all of that at the end of the day. We had a really great Christmas Eve and Christmas on Koh Samet swimming and relaxing and eating more of that great thai food.  
On the 26th we headed to another island, Koh Chang. The main difference between Koh Chang and Ko Samet is that Koh Chang is a much bigger, self-sufficient, and has fewer beaches. Unlike Koh Samet’s miles of low, smooth coastline, Koh Chang is filled with tall mountains, and has a very rugged coastline. It is also surrounded by coral reefs and is a minor mecca for scuba divers. While we did not partake in scuba diving, we had plenty of other adventures on Koh Chang, beginning with the trip there. The bus ride and the ferry boat were no problem, but once we got onto the island we ran into some problems. The hostel my friend had found was on the east side of the island, which is much more undeveloped, and none of the taxis were willing to head that way for less than 1000 baht or about 40 dollars. Even split three ways that was way too much, so we took the cheap cabs to the west side of the island, figuring that we could find a small ferry to take us to the other side. Unfortunately, when we got there the boats were gone, and when we called the hostel to ask what we should do, the person who answered the phone said that we had the wrong number and that the hostel was out of business. So, while my friends went to stop payment on the hostel deposit, I went around to various places to find rooms, and I quickly found some rooms near a small shop over the water. They were dirt cheap, and even though they did not have the best view, they proved to be a good base of operations for the days ahead.  
The next day, December 27th, we hung out on the extremely misnamed Lonely Beach. While the girls got massages, I went swimming because I was still nursing sunburn from Koh Samet, and I figured that when I got a famous Thai massage, I wanted to do it somewhere where there wasn’t so much sand. Lonely Beach nice, but unfortunately and ironically, extremely crowded and was really small, so we felt no real need to go there again the next day, instead we decided to check out those coral reefs and so took snorkeling trip. The trip was a bit pricy, about 12 dollars, but totally worth it. They took us to four different small islands and reefs and made us a lunch that was so good, many people had to skip the third stop because they were too full. The reefs were beautiful, and filled with some of the most colorful and daring fish I had ever seen. Some people brought pieces of bread to draw schools of fish to them, but even without a bread bribe, I was surrounded. Still, the trip was not all sunshine and tranquility, and a couple of times we found out how treacherous swimming among the reefs can be. Shannon and Susie both accidently cut their feet while treading water, and I sliced my two a little bit at our last stop. There, we parked at a dock and went snorkeling at the small beach nearby. It was a beautiful, but not the most ideal swimming location. First, the water was amazingly shallow. Even twenty-five feet out I could stand easily, and this made swimming a pain because there was barely enough water under me to keep me afloat. Also, the sand ended at about ten feet out and with the rest of the bottom being made up of fragments of dead reefs, shells, and rocks. Thus, most of the time I was not looking at the fish so much as trying to avoid scrapping my stomach on a piece of coral. Still, I made it totally unscathed until I stepped on the small jagged piece that I now have in my living room. 
After Koh Chang we headed back to Bangkok for New Years, site-seeing, cheap souvenirs, and some retail therapy at the three huge shopping malls in the center of Bangkok. The first thing we did when we got to Bangkok was leave Bangkok and head to the small city of Ayataya. Ayataya is the former capital of Thailand, and is the home of several important Buddhist temples and shrines. One of the most interesting sites that we saw at Ayataya was a giant reclining Buddha that had to have been at least sixty feet long. I have a picture of myself standing by its feet, and I am not even as tall as five of its toes. According to the tour guide, the reclining Buddha symbolizes Buddha going to Nirvana, or heaven, and fittingly the area surrounding it was filled with various temples and mausoleums dedicated to the ancient kings of Thailand. Another really interesting thing that we saw was a stone Buddha’s head, the last remaining piece of a slightly larger than life size statue. The body statue had been destroyed and the head had been left lying on the ground. Then, after several years, a tree took root in the ground underneath the head. Gradually, the tree has grown up and around the head, and now the stone head of a Buddha is imbedded inside it about four feet off the ground. It was amazing to see such a merger of the inanimate and animate, and only thing that could have made it more impressive was if the tree had been a Bodhi. After Ayataya we headed back to Bangkok and checked out Khao Shan Road, Bangkok’s backpacker capital. The street was packed with hostels, souvenir stalls, and food sellers, and I think that there were more ex-pats on than Thais. I tried to exercise restraint but must I admit that I probably got too many souvenirs and servings of Pad Thai while I was there.  
The next day, the three of us split off to do our own things. I was a little tired of temples after Ayataya, so I decided that instead of temple hopping again, I would spend the day at the Grand Palace, something that was very easy to do. First, it took me almost an hour to get into the palace between lines for tickets and lines for replacement pants. I was in the same kind of clothes that I had worn yesterday at all the temples at Ayataya but apparently that still was not good enough, and I had to borrow some pants to go in. Still, it was worth that minor aggravation. The palace was huge and beautiful, and I was able to kill to birds with one stone. Not only was the Grand Palace the King’s home and place of business, but it was also the location of another famous shrine, the Temple of the Emerald Buddha. If there was anything that I saw in Thailand that I would consider disappointing, the Emerald Buddha would be it. It just did not live up to all the hype. First, it was much smaller than expected, and it turned out that the statue of the Buddha was not even made of emerald, but was in fact jade. Actually, that was not a big deal, and I was very impressed to learn that the whole thing was made from one piece. If the problem was anything in particular it was that it was so poorly lit. Not only was the stature way up high, but it was nearly lost in shadow, which made it really hard to appreciate it. I just figured that a national symbol of such importance would be a little better displayed. The last two days were spent in the more modern, retail world of Bangkok. We went to the big mall in the center of the city and I got some new running shoes, a new mp3/phone to replace my ipod that went kaput right as I got to Thailand, and some new books. New Years, in Thailand was great. We had dinner and drinks at the hostel to keep down costs, and then we went to the center of the city to watch fireworks. A few of the people we were hanging out with that night had a little too much to drink and had to cut out early, but I made it well into 2009 before I headed to bed.
Unfortunately, the 2nd of January finally arrived and it was time to go home. Our flight was not until nine that night so we packed up and went around Bangkok one last time. I also finally got the famous Thai massage, and I have to say it was much nicer and classier than I expected. The masseuse only propositioned me once, and the parlor was very clean and comfortable. Eventually however, it was time to head home to Kazakhstan. I had one last feast of non-Kazakh fast food at the Burger King/Dairy Queen at the airport food court, put on my warm clothes to prepare for the winter we were returning to, and then finally, reluctantly, got on the airplane.

Lessons From MST

December 15, 2008

We just got back from our Mid-Service Training in Almaty, and while it was not strictly a vacation, it was a very worthwhile break. As was the case with IST it was just nice to hang out with the other volunteers and get some new ideas about classroom games and community projects. More importantly however, MST allowed me to compare general experiences with other volunteers. From my last couple of posts you may have noticed that I have been a bit frustrated with life here. Little things kept piling up and I just got angrier. This really bothered me because I genuinely like living here, and I considered myself open-minded and culturally sophisticated. Furthermore, while Kyzylorda is not gorgeous to be sure, it is a nice enough city, and I’ve got local friends and very supportive colleagues. Why then, did everything that I liked about those people for last year suddenly begin to drive me crazy? I think it was because somewhere along the line I forgot that just because I understand and respect a culture does not mean I have to like all of it. There are many things that I love about Kazakhstan, particularly the food, the close-knit family, and the bazaars. However, I do not have to like the fact that young men live with their parents well into their 20s and often cross the line between respectful sons and “mama’s boys,” or that it is perfectly ok to cheat on an exam. My mistake was to try to force myself to like everything about the country, even those things that were antithetical to my own upbringing and values. Since MST however, I have come to realize that I can be a lot more Zen about it. I will continue to respect Kazakhstan’s opinions about education and gender relations, but I do not have to give myself an ulcer trying to see those opinions as correct or equally valid. I guess what I am trying to say is that I have definitely given of hope fully integrating, but I am perfectly happy here going along with the idea of live and let live.

The Crazy Weather of Kazakhstan

December 3, 2008

I do not think that Al Gore has ever visited Kazakhstan, but in November we have had enough crazy weather to definitively prove his global warming thesis. I was struck at the intensity and implausibility of the weather witnessed. Furthermore, the speed at which the weather transitioned from one type to another was incredible, often taking only one day or even a couple of hours. The first week was five days of heavy, sometimes even torrential rain. This would be nothing unusual if Kyzylorda was not located in the desert/steppe of Kazakhstan, but I bet that we got our due of rain for an entire year. The following week brought a dense cold fog in the mornings that slowly disappeared in the mid to late afternoon. I figure that this could have been the result of the warm afternoon sun sucking water up off of the river that was then trapped near the earth as the temperature quickly dropped at sundown. The fog was so thick that I thought I was walking through a humidfier, and it was sometimes hard to breathe. In a city so flat that I can almost see my school from my apartment two miles away I could barely see five feet in front of me. Next came the Indian summer. When I went to work in the morning it had been in the high 30’s Farenhiet, but by the time I walked back to my house for lunch it had gotten up the high 50’s. As I mentioned before these weather patterns moved in with astounding speed, but the November heat week developed the fastest.. I have to admit that I was so caught off guard that I first thought I had caught a cold and had a fever. This “heat wave” has persisted even into the first week of December with no end in site. It looks like one of the coldest winters on record will be followed by one of the warmest.

Not Broken But Certainly Cracked

November 13, 2008

Teaching here in Kazakhstan has been a very enriching experience, however as I said before it has not been without its problems. What bothers me the most is not the problems themselves, but that many of them seem so fixable. For example, the source of much of my classroom frustration can be directly traced to Kazakhstan’s educational system that forces university and college students to determine their profession/major before they have even taken their first class. I guess doing this makes sense from a bureaucratic standpoint, because it makes it easier to assign students into neat, manageable groups. From a teacher’s standpoint however, it is a ridiculous idea. In Kazakhstan students begin college when they are around fifteen or sixteen years old, right after the 9th grade, and most of these kids are not prepared to make that kind of irrevocable decision. Hell, I was not prepared to make that decision until I was twenty, and I am still second guessing my decision. If I had been stuck with my first choice of major I would be a miserable seminary student right now instead of a happy-go-lucky Peace Corps volunteer. Furthermore, the major written on your diploma carries much more weight in Kazakhstan than it does in the United States. For example, I have been here for a year, and I am still explaining that while yes, I did study art history at university, that does not necessarily make me an art historian.  

When I discuss this with other teachers they say that its not that big a deal, if a student decides later that they do not want to be an English teacher or psychologist, they will just finish their college or university studies and then go to another University and study something else. This frustrates me to no end because not only is this a huge waste of the student’s time and money, but it is also a major waste of the teacher’s time. I cannot tell you how tired I am of teaching a class of thirty students where at least a third of them cannot speak any English and have not interest in learning it. They will never be teachers or translators, they just sit there doodling or text messaging their friends, waiting for the college to give them an unearned diploma and send them into the ranks of taxi drivers, waiters, and housewives. Most days I do really enjoy teaching, but having to stand in front of a class of thirty students when fifteen of them are totally apathetic is really depressing. I know that there are lazy students at American universities, but there are far fewer totally apathetic ones because they are able to wait and see what sort of subjects they are good at and interested in before making a decision.  

According to my colleagues, Kazakhstan is planning a major educational system reform to be initiated in 2010. The plan would have students attend school for ten years followed by two years of general education at a college after which students will choose their professions in preparation for four years of university study. This is a good start, but only time can tell if it will mean smarter and happier students. Perhaps all this is partly nostalgia for the American Education system, but I still think that major changes need to take place if Kazakhstan is going to be a nation of successful fulfilled students; a nation ready to take its place among developed nations by 2030.

Why Am I Here?

October 14, 2008

Lately, I have been asking myself “what am I doing here?” It is not that I am tired of living in Kazakhstan or that no longer enjoy what I am doing, it is just I have not been finding as much fulfillment regarding the reasons that I joined the Peace Corps in the first place. I joined the Peace Corps because I thought that I was providing the Peace Corps and Kazakhstan with important service, and would figure out who I am and what I want to do with my life at the same time. Unfortunately, I am beginning to realize that my presence is not really that necessary and I am more confused than ever as to my life’s vocation.

To be honest, Kazakhstan does not really need Peace Corps Volunteers. There are plenty of local English teachers, and most of them are quite skilled in both language and pedagogy. I may have a sunnier view of Kazakhstan’s education system because I work at a truly excellent college, but in general the local teachers do just fine. I know that as a Peace Corps volunteer and a native English speaker, I provide an important source of alternative and modern teaching methodologies, critical thinking, and English practice, but Kazakhstan’s education system will certainly not collapse without us. That said, both the people of Kazakhstan and Peace Corps volunteers get a lot out of our work together, and Peace Corps should remain present in Kazakhstan as long as possible. The fact remains however, that Kazakhstan will soon be developed to the point that we are no longer necessary, or more to the point, it is no longer financially feasible for the U.S. Government to support the program.

Furthermore, Peace Corps service has not yet been enlightening experience I expected it to be when I joined. I hoped that serving in the Peace Corps would provide me with some direction regarding my future profession or even just life in general, and while I have had a few personal and professional realizations, my future seems just as uncertain as it was before I came. I guess the problem is that I was expecting a burst of clarity, and instead have only been given a few cracks of blue in an otherwise very cloudy sky. For example, I have come to realize that while I enjoy some aspects of teaching, many others I do not. For example, I am not a huge fan of teaching new vocabulary words or giving grades, but I like leading my students in discussions or asking them questions that make there heads hurt. Thus, while perhaps teaching is not my ultimate vocation, if I could find another profession that involved asking people difficult questions that they did not want to answer and did not require living in a cardboard box or somewhere with ivy-adorned columns, it would be great. Still, as important as this little bit of self-awareness was, I am still totally undecided on a future graduate program or career path, and given that my service will be over in a little over a year, this is a worrisome problem. I cannot go back to Waco, TX with absolutely no idea what I want to do next.

Perhaps this sounds as if I have become disenchanted, but that is not the case. I do really like working as a volunteer, and believe it or not, most days I think that I make some kind of difference. I also enjoy living in Kazakhstan. The culture is very different to be sure, but I find it very interesting and attractive. At the same time there is much about my site, Kyzylorda, that reminds me of the city where I grew up. I think that it is this combination of the new and exciting with the familiar that has allowed me to achieve the self-awareness that I mentioned before. It is as if I am seeing my everyday life through a slightly tinted lens that allows me to recognize those things about myself that I was oblivious to before. So perhaps I know why I am here after all. I do not know if I will leave a lasting impression on Kazakhstan, but it is certainly leaving a lasting impression on me.

A Ecke Aly for My Grandmother

September 16th, 2008

Despite the physical distance California and North Carolina, I had a very close relationship with my grandmother, Ruth Mulllally (1913-2008). I was usually only able to visit twice a year, but thanks to phone calls, pictures, and email, she was constantly tuned into what I was doing, and my vast collection of Ninja Turtles only speaks for a fraction of the love and affection I received from her. Still, I think that it is almost unavoidable for a grandson to not know his grandmother as well as he might want to or should. Inevitably, I often viewed my grandmother through the prism of our relationship and so missed out on many important aspects of her character. I know that I have far from the whole picture, and I knew her for only a brief span of her long, wonderful life, it is clear to me that my grandmother was a remarkable woman.

My grandmother was still doing the New York Times Crossword puzzle well into her 94th year and was better informed about politics and world events then most people half her age. She was active in charitable projects throughout her life, and even took part in protesting against the Vietnam War when she was in her fifties. Finally, she went halfway around the world with my grandfather on numerous difficult journeys, and closer to home she calmly faced challenges that would have broken many others. She taught our family that if you are willing to take a risk and work hard, then good things will happen, and that the safe path inevitably leads to failure. While I may have gotten the idea of the Peace Corps from my aunt, it was from my grandmother that I got the courage to actually do it.

Ruth Mullally may not have been famous, but she left an indelible mark on all who met her, and presented a model of a life well lived. She had a loving marriage, three successful children, and the knowledge that she made a difference in the world. I can only hope to be so lucky. I dearly miss my grandmother, and in many ways I am still coming to grips with the fact that she is gone and I will never see or talk with her again. Fortunately though, I still have her memory and her example, and I hope that by living a life that she would be proud of, she will always be with me.

I Think It's the Glasses

September 8, 2008

School started last Monday, but like in American schools, not much got done during the first week. Partially this was due to the fact that the new students were still being introduced to the way the school works, but the main culprit in the huge waste of time was that we did not have a schedule for the first week of class. Instead, we taught ad hoc classes to whichever group happened to be free in whatever classroom was available. After about four days though, we got the permanent schedule and I was very pleased with it. I got all the classes I requested, including my comic book course and my American culture course and in great time slots too. I only have to come in super early two days a week, and my classes are back to back so I will not have to sit around for hours at a time between classes. As happy as I am though, I am kind of wondering why they were so accommodating. Do they really think that those courses are a good idea, or do I somehow exude some aura that makes people think I know what I am doing? If there is any trick involved, I would have to say it is the glasses. They must somehow make me look older and more experienced, because sometimes I feel like to my collegues I appear to be a 28 year-old M.ED with five years teaching experience rather than a 23 year-old with an art history degree and one year of experience. I mention this because whereas I got everything I wanted, my site mate who does not wear glass is having a hard time getting a schedule, much less a good one.

This sounds great I know, but before you any of you future PCVs out there go and buy a pair of specs, this quick acquiescence is not always great. It often hides misunderstanding or even disagreement, but they feel that it is more polite to do something else behind your back than say anything to your face. The reason I say this is that the other day I suggested to the chair of the department that the students elect their student dean this year, rather than the teachers choosing her as in years past. She said, “makul”, or ok, but that the dean would need to be from the third course instead of the fourth because they had responsibility for maintaining the room. That sounded fine to me, so I went ahead and began to prepare for elections. Yesterday, however, as I am putting up the sign up sheets and going up around to different classes encouraging kids to enter the race, two third students came up to me and said that the chair had already chosen them to be the Dean and Vice-Dean of the department, and that when the chair was discussing elections she thought they the students would just elect “helpers.” I guess the students could be lying, but I doubt it. It just drives me a little bit crazy, because if she did not like the idea in the first place she could have said so, it would not hurt my feelings. Also though, I feel like these kids should get a little practice running for office and electing leaders on the off chance that they actually get the chance to do it for their political leaders on the one day. Still I guess it was a good example of Kazak politics for me, because just as the chairmen appointed the student dean, the President of Kazakhstan appoints the Akim or Governor. Maybe one day this will not be the case, but it is hard to envision any alternative when young people only know the one system, and they are not even trusted enough to choose someone among them as a representative.

In all fairness, it is not that huge a deal. The dean does nothing except organize a few holiday parties during the school year. I guess I was just hoping that I could help transform it into a legitimate way for the students to bring the students’ grievances to the faculties’ attention and exercise some corporate responsibility. Also though, I am not a huge fan of the chair’s choice, and I was hoping that another girl would be elected. The girl I had in mind speaks better English, but also just seems more intelligent and responsible. I guess this is to be expected though; she wears glasses.